I’m willing to bet most of us have experienced this: At a certain age (and I think this is especially true for women), you become invisible. Department store clerks ignore you. Receptionists don’t see you standing two feet in front of them. Teenagers look right past you. (Actually, this last one is pretty much universal. Teenagers look past everyone.)

I like to think we run a multi-service blog here at Feeding on Folly, so I have devised a simple plan to help you out. Follow these steps and you will never be forgotten again.

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1. Don’t Wear Beige — Okay, I have to admit this might only apply to me. Maybe you rock beige. But for someone like me who has fair hair, fair skin and light-colored eyes, wearing beige is the equivalent of wearing camouflage. People walk straight into me because all they see is a blob of beige. But the point is, don’t dress in a blah color or style. Make an effort. Show some personality. Look at these two photos. Who are you more likely to remember?
2. Be the Crazy/Eccentric Aunt/Uncle — Have I ever told you about my Great Aunt Ida? I met her for the first time when I was 10. She lived in this tiny apartment packed to the hilt with antiques and old photos. She divorced three times — positively scandalous! And get this: back in the 20s she was a flapper! A real honest-to-goodness flapper! I can still see the photos of her with the long dangling necklaces and those gorgeous dresses. And I’ll always remember the stories Father told of his “Crazy Aunt Ida.” Keep in mind, the difference between being crazy and eccentric is simply a matter of money. If you’re rich, you get to be eccentric. (By the way, are you rich? Really? Have I told you how radiant you look in whatever you happen to be wearing at the moment? Drop me a line sometime. We’ll do lunch.)
3. Drive a Stylish Vehicle — I happen to know that one of the lovely readers of this blog drives a pink Kia Soul with eyelashes over the headlights. Upon one look at this car, there ain’t nobody who’ll be forgetting that baby. In fact, I must warn you dear reader, if you plan on committing a bank heist, you’ll want to use a different vehicle as the get-a-way car. Maybe something beige.
4. Act Like Someone Worthy of Being Remembered — Ah, now this is a tricky one, isn’t it? You didn’t know I was going to throw a curve ball at you. I mean, it’s one thing to avoid beige, be an eccentric and buy a new car, but actually changing your behavior? Now that’s something else entirely. The key is to behave in a manner worthy of being remembered, but not in a hoity-toity, look-upon-me-and-weep sort of manner. What I’m talking about is the opposite. The more you treat other people as worthy of your respect, the more they will respect and remember you. Of course, they will also remember you if you are a hoity-toity jerk-face too, but I’m assuming you want to be remembered in a positive way. Not in a way that gets your picture on a dartboard in the kitchen of your favorite restaurant. (Not that you do. I’m sure that’s not happening. But you may want to start leaving nicer tips, just in case.)

I realize that the more ambitious among you may want to be remembered in a greater manner than simply the nicely dressed woman/man who drives a cool car and leaves a generous tip. You may want to be indexed-in-a-history-book kind of remembered.

If that’s the case, you’ll have to wait until next week for part two. Meanwhile, here is a recipe for a memorable pastry in honor of my crazy Aunt Ida. I remember her serving us pastries when we visited her in Long Beach. A whole platter of pastries. Aunt Ida was not a woman for restricted tastes and pleasures. Something to think about.