Note: What follows is something I published two years ago. I’m rerunning it because a) We really did have a party this last weekend so it totally fits, and b) because of said party, the story I intended to publish isn’t ready. So until it is, I hope you enjoy this:
We had our annual holiday get-together last weekend, where something like 25 to 200 people stopped by our house to partake in food, drink, and stimulating conversation.
Twenty-five is the more likely number, but it’s all a matter of perspective. A very social, extroverted person might have looked at our gathering and thought, “My, what a charming little party this is.” While a more private, introverted person might have thought, “GAHHH!!!”
Regular readers of this blog know I lean more toward the latter than the former, and are no doubt wondering why I agree to these parties. Truth be told, in the days leading up to these events, I wonder it myself. But the fact is, I enjoy them.
I especially enjoy them when they’re over.
Also, I think we introverts owe it to society to show how parties should be done. Because from the parties I’ve thrown and the parties I’ve attended, I’ve come to one inescapable conclusion: Introverts throw better parties.
That is because – as with all things – we overthink them.
How an Extrovert Throws a Party:
- Sets up event on social media, tells friends to invite anyone they left out
- Gets on with life until day of party
- Buys food and drinks on day of party
- Welcomes guests at door
- Enjoys party
How an Introvert Throws a Party:
- Carefully reviews calendar and selects a day with least amount of personal conflicts, in which the moon and stars have aligned to give the best chance of success for a social event
- Looks over guest list; crosses out names, adds names, mostly crosses out names
- Researches several sites for recipes and decorating ideas
- Checks out party planning books at library, as well as several cookbooks
- Creates a menu, revises menu daily until hour before party
- Walks through home, imagines party in real time, considers main areas of gathering, best flow from one area to another; moves furniture several times until right balance is achieved
- Plans music for evening, selects song list with care
- Night before party wakes up several times thinking, “Did I remember to–” but of course they remembered to. They remembered all things
- Drinks glass of wine before guests arrive, or other calming beverage of choice
- During party, remains in kitchen for majority of evening, replenishing dishes that don’t need replenishing, providing safe haven for fellow introverts requiring no small talk
- After party, collapses on sofa and reviews evening, replays every moment, wonders how it could have gone better; pledges not to repeat event for a very long time
- Makes notes and plan of improvement for next event
I know other introverted party planners include pets at their soirees and I certainly appreciate them at any party I attend. But the sad fact is, phobias do exist and not everyone enjoys a cold nose at their crotch. Therefore I keep my furry friends safely hidden away.
That being said, I came up with a brilliant idea that I’m anxious to set up for any future parties: the Introvert’s Party Room for Rest and Recuperation.
Back when vinyls were all that, there was a huge record store in downtown Phoenix that had a separate room for classical music fans. It was great. When you walked in, all other sound was blocked out and you only heard classical. If memory serves right, there was always an aroma of leather and pipe tobacco. I was 15 years old and had no interest in classical music, but I seriously loved that room.
What I want is a similar room for overwhelmed party guests. The room must be easily accessible from the main area so they can slip in or out without detection. There will be comfy chairs, plenty of books and writing materials, a couple laptops with free wi-fi, and a dog.
Once the introvert was fully recovered, they could return to the party in progress.
Or not. No pressure.
Doesn’t that sound great? I’m going to get to work on that real soon. It may involve buying a new house, but dang it I’m determined.
If only because I’m the one in dire need of it. 😉
At this point my original article segued seamlessly into a recipe. In my early posts I did this quite a bit, as it was my shtick. I’m not sure why I quit the shtick. I was probably distracted by something shiny. In any case, I’ve got a recipe for you today.
Two for One Cookies
This is a recipe I came across in an old tattered cookbook with no cover, so I'm afraid I can't credit it properly. It's great for a party as it allows you to offer a variety of cookies without baking all day.
- 1 cup butter (softened)
- 1½ cups sugar
- 2 eggs, beaten well
- 2¾ cups flour
- 2 tsp. cream of tartar
- 1 tsp. baking soda
- 1 tsp. salt
- Add-ins (see below)
Mix together flour, cream of tartar, baking soda, and salt together. Set aside. Cream together sugar and butter. Add eggs and blend well. Add dry ingredients to wet ingredients and mix well.
At this point, shape the dough into a ball and divide in half. For each half, choose one of the following options:
- Add 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract, roll into balls and dip in a cinnamon/sugar mixture to make Snickerdoodles
- Add 1/2 teaspoon almond extract, roll into balls, flatten slightly and press an almond in the center to make Chinese Almond cookies
- Add one teaspoon either lemon or orange zest, can also add 1/2 cup dried fruit and/or nuts, roll into balls and flatten slightly, sprinkle with sugar
- Add 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract, 1 cup chocolate chips, 1/2 cup coconut and 1/3 cup chopped nuts, drop by rounded teaspoon onto cookie sheet
- Create your own option!
Place dough 2 inches apart on cookie sheet covered with parchment paper. Bake for 8-10 minutes at 350 degrees until lightly golden brown. Let stand a minute before removing from cookie sheet.
17 thoughts on “Party Planning for Friendly Anti-Socialites”
You missed one for introvert planning: Call doctor to see if there is any chance of needing major surgery just before party is scheduled (and hoping there is a chance).
Ah! Well, as it happens one year I really did have surgery early in December so we nixed the party. So yes, it does work! 😀
Ah, I remember reading this one the first time and being thoroughly enraptured with The Introvert’s Party Room for Rest and Recuperation. (For the record, I enjoyed this second booking just as much as the maiden voyage, proving that your pieces have a timeless quality, but we already knew that. And no, I’m not just saying that to justify my own revisits at Bonnywood. Okay, maybe a little.) Out of curiosity, I checked to see how I responded two years ago. I demurely clicked “like” but did not leave a comment, so I’m assuming we were still in the initial stages of dating and not yet in a full-blown blog relationship… 😉
Yes, I saw your debonair gravatar hiding in the likes!
I also noted that of the comments left there, none of the bloggers are still blogging. So maybe it’s best you stayed demure as the original post must have been a jinx. I tidied it up for this go-around, so I think you’re safe now. 😉
I love this too much – particularly the notion of a special room at a party for introverts. I need this so much. I also relate entirely to you being firmly rooted in the kitchen, unnecessarily replenishing dishes and providing a place for fellow introverts to escape to – no conversation required! I hardy need add that the parties I have given here make me sweat my own body weight because apart from every item on your list being entirely accurate I have to add a PS of ‘all the guests will speak entirely in French ….’
Oh golly, party guest speaking in another tongue — definitely not up for that!
I’ve decided my Introvert Party Room must be a requirement should I ever go house hunting again. And just imagine the real estate agent’s expression when I tell her it’s a deal breaker. 😀
Very very scary! I want you to sneakily snap the realtor should the need arise 😉
Now I want biscuits (cookies) – and an Introverts room – for everyday use. 🙂
I have a corner. One day I will have my own room. Of this I am certain. Also, the cookies are yummy!
Drat, now I really, really want homemade biscuits. 🙂
I too consider parties crazy overrated before and happy memories after. Some of my favorites memories were watching the world from the window of the classics room also. I must have latent introvert tendencies too! Happy Christmas, Christi🎄🎵😎
Do you remember that record store? That room was the best!
Happy Christmas to you too!
I moved around a lot but my favorite places consistently were the record stores in Son Cal & Phoenix. ❤
I like to keep the analysis simple: more than 6 guests? -> no party. Keeps the planning simpler. Of course it helps to have a minimum of family in the area.
BTW, do those cookies have shticky dough?
Only as shticky as you want it, and that sounds like genius party planning on your part. 👍
Nice party I say as I find the introvert room to enjoy it from. It is nice to find your own kind.
whether it on is on earth or in the matrix… jc
Thanks, JC. I suppose one of the disadvantages of our lot is our difficulty of finding one another. The internet is indeed our friend.
I’ll be sure to put a variety of snack foods and beverages in the introvert room so you can stay in comfort. 😉