I intended to post something today because – historically speaking — Wednesdays were my normal posting days. And while that ship sailed months ago, I thought this isolation business would put me in a writing mood.
Alas, it has not.
What it did do is help me uncover this emergency transmission… er, tweet… from The Doctor:
You’ll note she said to tell jokes, even bad ones.
Especially bad ones.
So here’s a couple I know:
You know what the farmer said when he saw a herd of elephants charging over the hill?
He said, “Look, here comes a herd of elephants charging over the hill.”
You know what the farmer said when he saw a herd of elephants charging over the hill wearing sunglasses?
He didn’t say anything. He didn’t recognize them.
Hey, I told you they were bad!
Feel free to add your own bad jokes in the comments.
In the meantime, stay strong. Stay positive. We got this.
How do you prevent an elephant from charging?
Take away his credit card.
Okay, I realize now I’ve no one to blame for that one except myself. 😀
🙂
It’s the eighth day of isolation and it’s like Vegas at our house. We’re losing money by the minute, cocktails are acceptable at any hour and nobody remembers what day it is!
I wish it was like that at my place! I’m working my butt off!
Sorry, it was my bad joke for Christi’s post! But my investments are losing money everyday and we don’t always remember what day it is!
Hahaha! 🙂
That’s a little too accurate. 🙂
Definitely!
Too soon!?
Haha — you know, my husband and I were just saying how we can’t remember what day it is!
– Why is it that elephants aren’t computer literate?
– They’re scared of the mice.
🙂
*snicker!*
Who knew elephants were so funny?!
What’s yellow and dangerous? Shark infested mustard. I love this little joke but everyone around me is super tired of it. Thanks, CJ for letting me resurrect it. cheers
hahahahaha — this made me both groan and giggle! The necessary two Gs for a perfectly bad joke. Kudos!
It’s not mine. My nephew (age 8 at the time) told me this a million years ago and I’ve loved it ever since.
What’s important is that you recognized its greatness and retold it multiple times. That, my friend, is what keeps bad jokes alive.
OR — I’m hopelessly trapped in little kid humour. Not a bad way to go.
My wife thinks I over-analyse our marriage, which, to be frank, completely contradicts the findings of my report.
Oh my, this was too funny to be bad!
You know, I’m beginning to think this should be a regular feature. I’ll have to think about it. (I have the time)
I actually loved those jokes but in fairness, I’m a simple soul and love jokes that others call bad … I think it’s something to do with not having to concentrate particularly hard on what is being said. It’s so good to see you …. keep dipping your nib in the ink …. the writing will re-emerge, I promise 😊
Thanks for the encouragement, Osyth. I need it more than I care to admit. 😉
In that case, I duly elect myself chief cheerleader which, being English by birth and French by training means something slightly different to the pompom ra ra found here. More a question of gently but stoically coaxing you with words of encouragement and cajoling with metaphorical tables laden with ridiculously pretty pâtisserie and effervescent apéritifs. This is entirely selfish because I have loved your work. In seriousness. Take good care of you is the main thing. Please.
So relieved, as I was never fond of ra-ra-sis-boom-ba types and I love me a good Macaron. 😉
Oddly enough I didn’t imagine you were a fan of the Pom-Pom bedazzlers 😉
How do you keep an elephant from sneaking under your door?
Tie a knot in its tail.
I’ll spare you the dirty elephant jokes I know!
*snort*
Yeah, okay, I see I definitely need to make this a regular feature. 😀
Timely transmission, Christi. Your feature photo looks like something out of Lost in Space, which reminds me of a bad alien joke. Why do aliens like to eat clowns? Because they taste funny. We got this!
*groan* *snicker* *snort*
Congrats, Joe – This may be the worst I’ve read. 😉
The image is the inside of the Tardis, but one of the early episodes. It might even be from the first season? (My son would know for sure.)
I won’t speak to the elephant in the room, but how about this one?
“Don’t you find Russian dolls annoying? They’re so full of themselves.”
Oh geez, Dave. I realize you have an unfair advantage when it comes to telling these.
Today I’m starting a bad joke feature — please contain yourself. 😉
Well, I’m sure you understand that I feel greatly compelled to toss in some groan-worthy jokes as well but, for once, I shall refrain. Which basically means that I can’t come up with anything right at the moment, so I’m pretending to be noble and feebly altruistic… 😉