Welcome to My Existential Crisis, Episode 5

In Which Our Alter Egos Discuss Life’s Purpose, Kierkekaard, and Peach Cobbler

If you missed our previous episode, click here.

Reporter: Hello everyone. Thank you for giving us another chance today. I know we thoughtfulhaven’t made the best impression the last few times.

Editor: Speak for yourself.

Reporter: What? You think you make a good impression? Don’t make me laugh.

Editor: I’m the only one who makes sense, so yes, I always make a good impression.

Reporter: (sighs) Maybe we should just start our discussion. And when we’re done, we can eat the Peach Cobbler I made. Is that all right with you?

Editor: Yes. I searched the room so I’m satisfied.

Reporter: What do you mean you ‘searched the room’?

Continue reading “Welcome to My Existential Crisis, Episode 5”

Welcome to My Existential Crisis, Episode 4

In which our Reporter self gets her revenge against our Writer and Editor selves.

Don’t remember what happened when we last left our alter egos? Don’t worry, it’s not important. But if you insist, here’s Part 3. (Don’t say we didn’t warn you.)

Writer: (walks into room, followed by Editor) I’m telling you, I think we hurt her feelings. We need to apologize.

Editor: And I keep telling you, she’s a grown woman. I’m sure she’s long gotten over it by now. Besides, it’s not like we did anything too terrible.

chair with ropeWriter: No, of course not. We only bound her and gagged her and stole her cake.

Editor: Well, sure. If you put it like that.

Writer: It’s so weird having her gone this long. Usually it’s only a day or two, like when she’s researching a lead or tracking down facts for me. We must have really pissed her off.

Editor: Pshaw. She’s fine. Don’t worry about it.

Writer: I can’t help it. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat… I’m becoming a nervous wreck.

Editor: You should do what I do. Suppress your emotions and pretend everything is fine.

Writer: Really? You think so? Continue reading “Welcome to My Existential Crisis, Episode 4”

Welcome to My Existential Crisis – Episode 3

In which our alter egos discuss philosophy, psychology, and our need for chocolate cake.

thoughtfulReporter: Hello everyone! So glad you could join us today. After our last episode — well, let’s be honest. That didn’t turn out as well as I hoped. I really thought a bit of psychotherapy was all we needed, but then we wound up–

Editor: Hey! Would you stop jabbering over there for one freakin’ minute and get her off me?!

Reporter: Uh… excuse me, folks… Now, Writer-self, you have your own chair. You don’t need to sit in Editor’s lap. Continue reading “Welcome to My Existential Crisis – Episode 3”

Welcome to My Existential Crisis, Episode 2

Editor: Hello lovely readers. If you remember the last time we were here... actually, I hope you don’t remember the last time we were here, as it ended in a brawl. Anyway, since then, my alter egos and I have had several heart-to-heart discussions, and we decided to have another go at this. Our Reporter self

Room with sofa and tableReporter: Hi everyone! So glad to be here!

Editor: Um, yes… well, our Reporter self has done a great deal of research on the topic of psychotherapy, read a number of books on the subject, and–

R: Actually, I just looked it up on Wikipedia.

E:  

R: You know, it’s really quite good. Wikipedia, I mean. Über helpful.

E: Really wish you told me that before I agreed to this.

R: Oh, now you’re being silly. Listen, all we really need to do is talk things out and everything will be fine.

E: Okay, but how can we talk things out if only two-thirds of us bother showing up?

(Door opens, Writer self walks in, takes seat next to Reporter.)

Continue reading “Welcome to My Existential Crisis, Episode 2”